Popular Post Lord Snooty Posted September 30, 2017 Popular Post Share Posted September 30, 2017 It's early I know. But... A) Lets mix things up a bit. Try something different. B) I've got a late night rendezvous and can't afford to miss it hanging about at home. --------------------------------- Wednesday - V - L**ds United What a week! I am still without a kitchen maid having given the last one her marching orders after last Sunday. Stubbs is grumbling and mumbling about the place having had to take over the cooking duties and the turret on the West wing is still crumbling away after I sacked the builders on Monday morning in a fit of pique when I discovered they were Sheffield United fans. And it's hardly been any better for the Wednesday. We had a chance to put things back on an even kilter by putting a struggling Birmingham side to bed. Typically though, they had sacked Bagpuss and the interim manager did what interim managers always do - put an end to a miserable run by beating Sheffield Wednesday. It was ever thus. So now, with 2 defeats in a week, we face the mother of all games as those rowdy goons from up the road L**ds United come to Hillsborough. Another game broadcast to the nation. Another trial, another examination under the microscope of the TV lens. We're in a cloud at moment and the club with more banning orders than any other in England are due in town. Their cattle train will be rolling into Sheffield with their boisterous yobbos on board . Mind, L**ds wouldn't be up the road if I had anything to do with it. They wouldn't be anything at all. I submitted plans in 1995 to have L**ds removed. Not the football club you understand. All of it. The entire City. I had come up with a plan at the time, which I believed then and I still believe now, would have made Yorkshire a far better place. L**ds was to be filled in with water to create a huge internationally famous nature reserve. I had hoped it would provide one of the most important wildfowl sanctuaries in Great Britain, regularly holding in excess of 50,000 waterfowl. I'd already had the wink from a chap I knew in Westminster that it would be rubber stamped as a European Special Protection Area and internationally recognised as a globally important wetland site. The reserve would be fed via shoreline waters directed in from the Humber in a series of manmade water ways and shallow water lagoons. I had hoped to have over 150 bird watching hides and nature trails with four visitor centres with experts to help you with identification. I had also put in plans for some Swiss style chalets, each named after a Wednesday Legend. A wooded park would skirt around the edges of the lakes and lagoons providing, bike rides, nature walks. Boating lakes. Oh how wonderful it would have been. It would have been a wondrous thing for the people of Yorkshire. My gift to them. All was going swimmingly until some smart Alec asked me where I intended to re-house the people of L**ds. "Re-house them?" I scoffed "Ha! Why, that's the best part of this whole operation. I'm going to fill that place in while they're still in it. Drown them. That's what we do with vermin on the estate." Typically as the plans were going through in 1997 the Bill of Human rights swept in and the plans were immediately knocked back. Of course I argued long and hard that L**ds folk weren't actually human. But it was on deaf ears. I was threatened with being sent down for intention to commit genocide by the do-gooders. Bit harsh . Think of all the good it would have done. Now I'm stuck with a load of slum houses in outer Bradford I bought up which I had thought would be lakeside properties. But there we go... So there is sadly still a L**ds and still a L**ds united . This season they have been playing a 4-2-3-1 under yet another gaffer, Dane Thomas Christiansen. *Wednesday will freshen things up by pulling an absolute flanker on them by pulling out a brand new 3-5-2 system with Hooper playing in a completely free role behind an exciting new front partnership of Nuhiu and Hirst. The big man will come in and provide a battering ram role keeping both centre halves busy creating acres of space for young Hirst to exploit at will. Reach and Hunt will be at wing back and our possession based football will be consigned to the bin as Hunt will don an 80's wig and do his best impression of Zico Sterland, hitting Nuhiu early with a driven 35 yard pass at every opportunity and Wednesdays attacking midfield of Hooper, Bannan and Lee will charge in like cheapsakes in a 6am queue at a new IKEA trying to get a freebie. *None of this will actually happen. COME ON WEDNESDAY! 3 1 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OWLS haven Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Wow.early Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eastleigh Owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 1 minute ago, owlshaven said: Wow.early Late night rendezvous apparently, hope he's got his stockings, suspenders and flippers with him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athelwulf Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Best get plenty of laxatives down us then, in preparation for the half-time bowel movement. I think we're going to need it. And spare a thought for those who work at Blackburn Meadows. They're on the receiving end, and some of them might be Owls. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shez owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Carlos's swan song? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreshOwl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 (edited) It's not gonna be pretty 0-2, both goals in the 2nd half I predict 11 shots, 2 on target for us Edited September 30, 2017 by FreshOwl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronio Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Evening all, Nice one Snoots. Time to get back to winning ways. We really need to get our campaign back on track. No more excuses now. Players need to step up to the plate and deliver the goods. Going to be a tough one for sure, but I think the crowd will help us get over the line. 2-1 Wednesday win. Hoops and Bazza with the goals. LETS DO THIS!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Maxine Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 I wish I had a late night rendezvous come on Wednesday we can win the Weeds. have fun snooty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jellybean Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 we'll lose one nil and bore the pants off of us fans but more importantly we will manage 20 shots with 4 on target so it won't matter as we'll have played alreyt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WayneTheOwl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 5 minutes ago, Maxine said: I wish I had a late night rendezvous come on Wednesday we can win the Weeds. have fun snooty. Me to Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doghouse Daz Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Wonderful OMDT M'lud, that bill of human rights has a lot to answer for, looks amazing on the map. NOW COME ON WEDNESDAY 5 - 0 and I might think of buying one of those God awful new shirts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eastleigh Owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Oh FFS, just had a phone call from Snooty, is there anyone available to nip down Water Lane (I've been left some time) and bail him out? He's been arrested walking round Fitzalan Square in a bra, stockings, suspenders and flippers singing the Boxing Day Massacre song. Apparently it's against some local law to sing in public after 10-00 PM. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
horny owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Got a funny feeling we'll go and win this one for some reason Not bothering to watch it though I've done with the boring cr@p they're serving up 1-0 win and Carlos unfortunately stays at S6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legendaryswan Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Always look foreward to leeds games,tough games,hard fought,right back to the revie days,it was always a decent game for spectators and tv alike. Need to go into the break on a high after a shockingly bad week. COME ON YOU OWLS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Sl-OWL-ly Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 We will beat Leeds tomorrow ! We’re the underdogs and Chansiri is back, trust me we will win.. The odds are in our favour.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Sl-OWL-ly Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 2 minutes ago, Eastleigh Owl said: Oh FFS, just had a phone call from Snooty, is there anyone available to nip down Water Lane (I've been left some time) and bail him out? He's been arrested walking round Fitzalan Square in a bra, stockings, suspenders and flippers singing the Boxing Day Massacre song. Apparently it's against some local law to sing in public after 10-00 PM. Leave him where he is, Stubbs has told me he will pop around and arrange his release in the early morrow, he says Snoot’s likes a good breakfast before a game and arranged for SYPD to provide it as they can’t do feck all else.. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Copthorneowl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Well done Snooty must say I admire your commitment .....and good luck team and also Carlos hope we can go into the break with less anger and a good win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eastleigh Owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 38 minutes ago, Eastleigh Owl said: Oh FFS, just had a phone call from Snooty, is there anyone available to nip down Water Lane (I've been left some time) and bail him out? He's been arrested walking round Fitzalan Square in a bra, stockings, suspenders and flippers singing the Boxing Day Massacre song. Apparently it's against some local law to sing in public after 10-00 PM. @Lord Snooty So sorry m'lud, I did try. I'm too far away to be of any use to you and no-one else seems interested. Maybe you can catch the second half in the Hen and Chickens Is it still open BTW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WalthamOwl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 I flippinghate dirty Leeds. Come on Wednesday please smash these. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flat Owl Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Well done Snoots...cracking idea to create a home for the pond life. As always with derbies, the ones who want it will win... What has CC got to lose by putting Joao on for some pace and pressing their dodgy keeper. COME ON WEDNESDAY, WAKE UP... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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