Chris Kirkland on leaving Sheffield Wednesday

[FroggattOwls]

1 minute ago, @owlstalk said:

 

How does that fix him missing his kids etc?

You're just looking at the commute side of his depression

Are you honestly saying that if someone stays in a hotel and gets the train it will fix their depression?

I genuinely (no disrespect meant here whatsoever as we all have different experiences/knowledge in life) think you need to read up on things like depression. 

Just getting trains and stopping in hotels would probably have had zero effect on the bigger picture with Chris (without knowing his personal story 100%)

Not at all. Non of us can possibly know.

 

But the story reads like he was suffering from worry and street about a two hour drive to swfc and back every day. That’s fixed by staying in a hotel. I’ve don’t it for for work. 5 hr trip to a site Monday morning. Stay in a hotel near work 10 minutes in, much better. I’ve no idea what was causing his depression none of us do, but what seemed to cause it was daft decisions and choices that just weren’t necessary for someone in his position. 

[FroggattOwls]

2 minutes ago, @owlstalk said:

Ps just to clarify that with depression/mental health issues you cannot pay to make it go away

 

You just can't

But you can make good choices to mitigate things, and money helps these good choices. Which footballers have a lot of.

[EcclesallOwl]

 

[@owlstalk]

Just now, FroggattOwls said:

But the story reads like he was suffering from worry and street about a two hour drive to swfc and back every day. That’s fixed by staying in a hotel. 

 

Thing is with mental health and depression when someone says they were suffering from not seeing their kids as much, saying something like 'stop in a hotel then mate' would actually make it worse for that person.

There's a way bigger picture.

The commute will have been one tiny little side of it

[Bakewell Owl]

10 hours ago, DJMortimer said:

People should consider these kinds of things when they flippantly talk of "delicate little flowers" and what it might be like playing in front of large crowds of angry supporters when things aren't going well. It would be interesting to know how many players really suffer like this without speaking publicly about it.

I personally have fortunately never suffered with anything like this, and I was in the "grow some balls and man up brigade" recently i have had a very close family member suffer, and i was lost as to what to do, to say i have changed my opinion is an understatement.

, my heart goes out to him

[@owlstalk]

Just now, FroggattOwls said:

But you can make good choices to mitigate things, and money helps these good choices. Which footballers have a lot of.

I genuinely don't think you understand mental health issues/depression.

You can't pay to make it go away

You can splash out on taxi's, trains, hotels etc but that wouldn't have fixed a thing (probably).

 

[Stoop]

I do believe in managing your triggers

 

In Kirkland’s case I would imagine it only hit home how bad the commute etc was affecting him after he’d signed the contract, and continued so’s not to let anyone down

[@owlstalk]

 

Ps it's really good this thread exists as it can help share knowledge and experience of mental health issues or depression and try to explain it to those who never have had it.

It's a very complex issue and it's interesting to read that some folk believe that throwing money at it is the answer (it isn't).

 

[@owlstalk]

1 minute ago, Stoop said:

I do believe in managing your triggers

 

In Kirkland’s case I would imagine it only hit home how bad the commute etc was affecting him after he’d signed the contract, and continued so’s not to let anyone down

 

I would hazard a guess that even if the commute was only ten minutes for him, that his depression/mental health issues would have surfaced another way

The actual commute time will not have been the reason behind his mental health issues at all really, they'll just be something that triggered a feeling in his mind that triggered his depression off.

 

Even if his commute had been just ten minutes and he could have still seen his kids I'm guessing that he would still have been depressed anyway through something else.

[Stoop]

Just now, @owlstalk said:

 

I would hazard a guess that even if the commute was only ten minutes for him, that his depression/mental health issues would have surfaced another way

The actual commute time will not have been the reason behind his mental health issues at all really, they'll just be something that triggered a feeling in his mind that triggered his depression off.

Oh definitely 

 

You can remove one problem and then something else will then take its place. It doesn’t alter the main issue 

[Stoop]

I think blue and white is involved in mental health. Be interesting to get his take on this 

[Penfold]

A good goalkeeper who had a good spell at the club. Yet another story of a player that had to fight through tough times but remained professional. Hats off to him. It’s a real shame what he’s gone through and hopefully by talking about it he can help to get better. Feel like I have a better rapport with him now than when he was at the club and this may help some young footballers out there to start talking about their troubles. 

[Beighton Owl 87]

24 minutes ago, FroggattOwls said:

Not at all. Non of us can possibly know.

 

But the story reads like he was suffering from worry and street about a two hour drive to swfc and back every day. That’s fixed by staying in a hotel. I’ve don’t it for for work. 5 hr trip to a site Monday morning. Stay in a hotel near work 10 minutes in, much better. I’ve no idea what was causing his depression none of us do, but what seemed to cause it was daft decisions and choices that just weren’t necessary for someone in his position. 

How does being away from loved ones on your own every day fix any anxiety issues he may have had?

[royalowlisback]

Depression/mental health issues can hit anybody. Having loads of money helps pay the bills, but it doesn't fix what is bothering your brain.

 

I suffer from it occasionally, but have never really told anybody, cos I'm a bloke and that's what we do. When everybody around me is happy, it can be the worse time.

 

For example, when everyone is jumping around like loonies after we have won a big game (the play-offs, beating Man U at Wembley or whatever) I actually feel at my lowest, what else is going to compare to that feeling, that high?

 

Like most people who suffer from depression, I use humour to deflect it, nobody suspects the clown in the room is the most miserable one in there (although clowns, the child-catcher and Worzel Gummidge still scare me to death, even now - why did they think it acceptable for him to have interchangeable heads, plus I have an ex named Sally).

 

 

[FroggattOwls]

1 hour ago, @owlstalk said:

 

How does that fix him missing his kids etc?

You're just looking at the commute side of his depression

Are you honestly saying that if someone stays in a hotel and gets the train it will fix their depression?

I genuinely (no disrespect meant here whatsoever as we all have different experiences/knowledge in life) think you need to read up on things like depression. 

Just getting trains and stopping in hotels would probably have had zero effect on the bigger picture with Chris (without knowing his personal story 100%)

*Sigh* 

 

In the article Chris states one of the triggers was a 4 hour a day commute. 
 

That’s absolute madness, no wounder he was stressed and depressed. I would be having to do Wigan to S6 and back every day. At no point have I belittled him. I’ve stated there were many  options available to him that could have made his life less stressful, many many options. Having a flat in Sheffield, hotels, getting a driver. Anything other that commuting four hours a day. I can’t believe swfc didn’t suggest or try and help out. 

 

I can get my head around someone in his position doing a four hour a day commute. It just doesn’t make sense. 

[Harrysgame]

1 hour ago, @owlstalk said:

 

 

How would that have meant he could pick his kids up from school?

I think you are both missing the point here entirely.

There's a bigger picture to mental health/depression that isn't solved by solving just one of the things that add up to a much bigger issue.

Just saying 'get to work on a train' or 'stop in a hotel' is missing the point entirely.

Agree, for 90% of people there would be no effect for the remaining if it wasn't the travel would be something else that triggers the issues. Well done CK for speaking out.

Seems there are still plenty of people who think it can be cured by someone telling them to pull themselves together or tell8ng them how lucky they are.

[FroggattOwls]

16 minutes ago, Harrysgame said:

Agree, for 90% of people there would be no effect for the remaining if it wasn't the travel would be something else that triggers the issues. Well done CK for speaking out.

Seems there are still plenty of people who think it can be cured by someone telling them to pull themselves together or tell8ng them how lucky they are.

No one has said that, people have questioned why on Earth he was doing a four hour commute when there were many other options as that was utter madness. 

[markg]

1 hour ago, @owlstalk said:

It's nothing to do with being pampered whatsoever.

Depression/Mental Health can affect anyone and everyone. We know this because anyone and everyone gets it regardless of income, race, religion, gender, sexuality, marital status etc

 

It is so frustrating that people can't see it as an illness. Medical experts tell us that it is yet people think that the know better. 

 

It's like saying so and so has a lot of money and is privileged. How can they get cancer?

 

[@owlstalk]

Just now, markg said:

It is so frustrating that people can't see it as an illness. Medical experts tell us that it is yet people think that the know better. 

 

It's like saying so and so has a lot of money and is privileged. How can they get cancer?

 

Exactly

You only have to read this thread so far to see that.

 

"He's got loads of money so why doesn't he just get a chauffer - that'll fix his depression' etc

 

If money = no depression then why are so many people with money suffering from it?

It's not poor spending choices ffs

 

 

 

[FroggattOwls]

6 minutes ago, @owlstalk said:

Exactly

You only have to read this thread so far to see that.

 

"He's got loads of money so why doesn't he just get a chauffer - that'll fix his depression' etc

 

If money = no depression then why are so many people with money suffering from it?

It's not poor spending choices ffs

 

 

 

Literally no one said that.