Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I was looking to buy some rose tinted spectacles but while I was trying them on all the others looked so nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Arseowl Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 Went to by a jumper yesterday but couldn't find on that I liked Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ratty-owl Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I opened a bakery recently, and a lady phoned me up saying " Happy Brthday I Suck *****" written on it. I thought It was weird, but made It anyway. Mrs Cox was really pissed off when I delivered it, so was her son Isaac. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I developed a formula for memory loss. I really should have written it down though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vulva Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 (edited) Which is more important, length or girth? Turns out it's consent. Edited October 7, 2012 by vulva Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stoop Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 After watching us lose again yesterday I thought I'd cheer myself up by taking our lass out. Only took one punch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stoop Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I opened a bakery recently, and a lady phoned me up saying " Happy Brthday I Suck *****" written on it. I thought It was weird, but made It anyway. Mrs Cox was really pissed off when I delivered it, so was her son Isaac. Radio 1 dj Sara cox's son is called Isaac True story Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I tried to share a kebab with a homeless guy I saw sitting on a bench last night. He told me to rumble off and buy my own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I've just borrowed a book on surgery from my local library. Some rogerer's taken the appendix out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adamb1253 Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 Are you trying to say we should have kept Ryan Lowe Neil? poo pooSOTRM 5pm. Friday. Owlstalk will sort it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Deleted member Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 Sat having breakfast this morning with the mrs. I looked across and meant to say, could you pass me the brown sauce please, instead it came out as, "you've flippingruined my life you *****". I was looking to buy some rose tinted spectacles but while I was trying them on all the others looked so nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theowlsman Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 (edited) We're all doomed http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRfW4aVfUW0&feature=youtube_gdata_player Why worry? Edited October 7, 2012 by theowlsman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ratty-owl Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 My girlfriend was putting sun tan lotion on "do you mind doing my back" she asked. Lets pretend I'm your butler I winked, you can call me Dawes. OK she giggled " would you mind doing my back Dawes " That was all the invitation I needed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 I was playing football with some guys from Alaska and not one of them could hit a shot on target. flipping Heskeymos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ratty-owl Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 Females are the only species that defy the basic laws of gravity..... The more they weigh the easier they are to pick up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Almat Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 (edited) I lent my best mate £10,000 to have plastic surgery. He's not paid me back and now I don't know what he looks like. (OK, copyright Emo Philips). Edited October 7, 2012 by Almat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 My girlfriend says she's leaving me because of my obsession with horse racing......... She's at the gate now and she's off... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fedor Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 My wife's just broke her clothes horse. It's the end of an airer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swfc-dan Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 God we miss those players Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innes Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 (edited) wot team does king kong support? aston gurrilla that has to be one of the poorest jokes I've heard Edited October 7, 2012 by Innes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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