asteener1867 Posted January 2, 2016 Share Posted January 2, 2016 I never ever listen to the commentary on radio...Wednesday player...or owt else... If Wednesday are away and I'm not watching Stelling.....I rely on texts from the lad... Its a f.ookin' mental way of doing it when you are driving... I watched the first 15 on SSn....Then I have to drive to Toytown to pick the wife up....(Yes,....She is a hooker) anyroadupwards... Halfway there...phone text message...the phone is in me pocket..it can only be the lad.... I only have to read the first couple of words "Get the f.ook... I know the rest..The Wizards are 1 up.... The car slides slightly to the right as I punch the steering wheel.... Now..The next text I should get is either Wednesdays second..or a Fulham equaliser... But...Me lad totally forgets the script for when one of us is driving... "Beep!!" "Sh*t"... I think..."Fulham got the equaliser quickly"..Pull in.... "Wallace wonderstrike"..it says.. Fair enough Then he totally loses the plot.... *BEEP* *Fulham having all the possession* I mean...who f.ookin' cares...!!! *BEEP* *Half time* I fookin' know that...I'm drivin' a bleedin' Nissan not a f.ookin' 1925 Oxford f.ookin' Cambridge... God knows how I make it to f.ookin' Brampton without causin' a pile up. Second half kicks off...I'm parked up..no problem... Wife is out with about 20 minutes to go.. First thing she says is... "1-0 to the Wizards..." You know when you want to be really really f.ookin' sarcastic....but you can't cook tea..I did that... "Yup" Now you see it gets a little safer...cos the wife answers the texts of me idiot son..but I still jump every time it f.ookin' goes off *BEEP* "They're all over us" Wife replies... "No worries..the games won" Son ..IMMEDIATELY replies with "Hiya Mum" Cos he f.ookin' KNOWS I would never look that sorta gift horse in the mouth He then..in the last 10 minutes goes ape.... *BEEP" "B*stard I scream..f.ookin' Fulham!!" Wife.. "No love.... Sogou on for Wallace" He's texting substitutions!!!...I'm on a f.ookin' busy road!!! All the results are comin' in...no texts...I'm startin to relax..and drive not so much on the pavements... *BEEP* "Dirty stinking lucky Cockney F.OOKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "No love...Joao for Nuhiu" F.ook knows how I got home... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Farrell Posted January 2, 2016 Share Posted January 2, 2016 I read every one of your posts as a poem or verse. I find it very confusing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edmontonowl Posted January 2, 2016 Share Posted January 2, 2016 Well, at least you weren't guilty of distracted driving Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asteener1867 Posted January 2, 2016 Author Share Posted January 2, 2016 I read every one of your posts as a poem or verse. I find it very confusing. I expect you would...especially this one..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Farrell Posted January 2, 2016 Share Posted January 2, 2016 I expect you would...especially this one..... The amount of times I've thought not one of his best before I realised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lukestheman82 Posted January 2, 2016 Share Posted January 2, 2016 When he gets home is he going over your knee for swearing, albeit in a text? I'm 37 and still wont swear around me dad... Maybe his being fitter than me and an ex boxer has summat to do with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bradowl Posted January 3, 2016 Share Posted January 3, 2016 I'm abroad so followed yesterday's game on twitter following owlsonline. Whoever's doing updates must have sore fingers this morning because they were updating every few seconds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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