Wednesday - V - Norwich OMDT

[Lord Snooty 55,595]

 

 

"Toast, marmalade and a strong pot, Stubbs."

 

"Uhm, it is 1:30am ,Sir"

 

"I mean for later, I'm just getting the order in now so to speak. Want to make sure you've got all the supplies in. So, yes, toast Marmalade and a strong pot. Then when I'm dressed I'll come down for the main event. Bacon, eggs, cooked toms too. Fry the loaf I think, and make sure there's a few slices of the old black pudding for me to put myself on the outside of. Yes, I'll need a hearty one all right. Need the innards lining for a tough one in prospect."

 

"Indeed, a tough game Sir, however it may have escaped your attention, that the game is taking place on Sunday lunch time, Sir"

 

"The game? I'm not on about that. I know it's on Sunday! Not that I'll be watching or listening, I'm done with them all! I wouldn't watch again if they paid me!"

 

"Then if I may be so bold as ask..."

 

"I've a meeting with the Villagers in the square this eve. Been a bit of a stink."

 

"Really Sir?"

 

"Yes, yes, 'fraid so. I don't know if you recall last Winter. I promised the villagers they could have the Easter fete in the bottom paddock."

 

"I do recall, Sir"

 

"Well, I decided , all being what it is, you know, to charge them entry this year."

 

"Most philanthropic , Sir"

 

"Eh?"

 

"Charging a small admission to further bolster the funds for the new Church roof"

 

"Ahh. Well, you see, this is the thing you see. I thought we might keep it for the upkeep of the paddock. I mean, they want to come in and tramp about the place, only right there should be a bit of a donation to the cause! Not gone down as well as I'd hoped. "

 

"I see ,Sir.  Still , the event has been cancelled has it not, with the on going Covid situation so I'm sure it will soon be forgotten."

 

"Well, there's the thing you see. I've already taken the money up front."

 

"Up front, Sir?"

 

"That's what I said isn't it? Yes, I got a bit carried away. Have you ever had any of that Alcoholic ginger beer ,Stubbs?"

 

"I have not, Sir"

 

"Well if you take my advice you'll keep it that way. Sunny day, refreshing drink. You know what it's like, the worlds your onion"

 

"Oyster, Sir"

 

"Whatever. So, few drinks, I got to thinking. Take the money up front and it's a triple winner. You see, we bank the cash and then that's ours whatever happens, thing gets rained off and no one turns up, no matter, the cash in already sat in the safe! The second bonus is of course, we can then charge more to those that want to turn up on the day you see. Extra rev. if you get the picture. If the Pay-on-the-dayers do attend - we make more and if they don't attend, then that's no loss either because it means  less riff -raff , you know yourself the type, legs it down from the Miners Helmet at the last minute every year sloshing with ale to see what all the fuss is about. So we win every which way."

 

 

"I understand the thinking, Sir... of the advanced bookings at least."

 

"Yes, yes. Problem is, I was in the village earlier and I saw old Miss Slaughtermyre from the Womens Institute. Well, you won't believe it, she gave me a right old blast of the foghorn. I ended up with a centre parting."

 

"A formidable woman ,Sir"

 

 

"I'll say. Anyway, I don't know if you've ever been to the edge of the lake to have a little tinkle and the next thing you know the gaping jaws of a crocodile snap from the waters edge?"

 

"I haven't found myself in that position, no, Sir" 

 

"Well, me either, but I expect the look on a chaps face that did wouldn't have looked much different from my dial when the Slaughtermyre leapt from behind the postbox saying she wasn't paying for an event she couldn't attend. Terrified me. My soul leapt 6 feet in the air and the body was still stood in my suit. Anyway, trying appease the old lizard I promised her a refund."

 

"Most generous ,Sir"

 

"Too generous Stubbs! Too generous, she's told everyone in the village and now they all want one!"

 

"This may be beneficial in restoring your reputation, Sir. A silver lining, if you will"

 

"Yes, I know what you're saying here ,Stubbs,  I do, but I'm afraid this is where the head dips for the third time in the soup though. I can't  give them a refund."

 

"Why is that,Sir?"

 

"Well, the money's gone! I've back dated some of it to last years accounts. And I've projected the rest onto next years accounts"

 

"All of it ,Sir?!"

 

"Well there were a few groats left"

 

"That's something at least"

 

"Not really, I gambled it on a nag at the 2:10 at Wimpleton, a tip from my top advisor"

 

"How did it get on ,Sir?"

 

 

 

 

""

 

" I see ,Sir" 

 

"There's not a sov. in the pot ,Stubbs. What am I going to do?"

 

"I would suggest locking yourself in the tower in the East wing for a few weeks under the pretence of self isolating due to Covid, until this has all blown over,Sir"

 

"And what am I mean to do up there!"

 

"You could watch Wednesday, Sir?"

 

"Ugh! I thought I'd got away with that.  And who's mob are our wretched  lot playing this time?"

 

"Farke's, Sir"

 

"They certainly are Stubbs, just the word I was looking for, wretched farke's the lot of them."

 

 

 

------------------------------------    ---------------------------------

 

WEDNESDAY

V's

NORWICH CITY

 

English Championship

Kick Off : 12:15

Hillsborough

 

Norwich City come to Hillsborough to put another nail in the lid  this  Sunday afternoon looking to move a step closer to winning the Championship title.

 

Meanwhile, Wednesday begin the weekend sitting seven points adrift of safety with  boss Darren Moore still looking for his first win in charge.

 

-----------------  ---------------

 

WEDNESDAY

 

Darren Moore  will be without Julian Borner after the defender was sent off against Reading last weekend.

 

Cheyenne Dunkley could come back into the middle of defence, unless Moore opts to drop Sam Hutchinson back in and 

 

Moore must decide who to play up front as the goal shy Owls need wins to have any chance of staying up. Windass, Rhodes, Marriott and Paterson are the options, though none seem to relish the lone role.

 

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

NORWICH CITY

 

Teemu Pukki has now scored nine goals in just seven appearances, while Emiliano Buendia has chipped in with eight contributions in the final third over the same period.

 

While the influence of the pair cannot be overstated, Norwich have gained a greater advantage at the top of the table through conceding just two goals.

 

Their fifth clean sheet arrived against Luton Town last weekend, maintaining the momentum ahead of a favourable run of games against Wednesday, Nottingham Forest and Blackburn Rovers before the international break.

 

Despite having had a week to prepare for this game, Farke may decide to replace Lukas Rupp with Mario Vrancic.

 

Barring any late injury issues, the remainder of the Norwich XI could stay the same.

 

 

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Edited March 14 by Lord Snooty

[Rogers 5,166]

2-0 Norwich Pukki to score 

[Morepork 14,792]

I am genuinely afraid to watch this......

 

I'm looking for something, anything, just the slightest sign of fight, a smidgeon of pride, a glimmer of hope.

 

 

PS: Did Neil supply the form guide by any chance..... 

Edited March 13 by Morepork

[jonnyowl 4,878]

A day early.

[Sticky Micky 8,797]

Aren't we 'playing' sunday? 

[Manwë 4,025]

Something not quite right with the form guide, can't quite put my finger on it.

 

But I suspect Wednesday will continue on our superb winning ways and Norwich will keep hurtling down to the abyss with their awful run of defeats.

 

Should be wrapped up by the 30th minute I suspect.  

[Holmowl 25,064]

6 minutes ago, jonnyowl said:

A day early.

 

3 minutes ago, Sticky Micky said:

Aren't we 'playing' sunday? 

‘kinnell guys keep it down.

 

Only Norwich and Sky think it’s Sunday. Come 12.15 today we get 3 vital points when we line up and the Norwich players are on their coach playing cards and watching old Blackadders.

 

Score

Sheff Wed 3 - 0 Norwich (default)

Scorers N/A

Shaw Red 1 min

Hutchinson Second yellow 14 mins

[quinnssweetshop 5,033]

Rhodes to score hat - trick

For Norwich

Goes into sulk post game and regresses to his happier times with a club he loves.

Prediction for Sunday League ( quite apt given our style of play )

SWFC 0 - Norwich 4

Up the Owls
Chansiri out !!!!!

[heppers 5,857]

I think we will sneak a win.

[horny owl 7,860]

So are we playing at home? I though we were away for this one

 

Anyway doesn’t matter 3-0 to Norwich 

 

At half time

 

5-0 final score

 

Rubbish new manager talks b0ll0cks at the end

 

Repeat next week

[NobbyStyle 205]

Great OMDT Lord Snooty. Good luck with the villagers.

Reminds me of something I’ve read on here as it happens.

 

At least with some of the admission fees you will have been able to do the improvements to the paddock, haven’t you? Whilst it’s been empty?

 

Hoping for the best tomorrow, fearing the worst.

 

Anyway UTO 

 

[bladeshater 6,414]

Up the owls 

Same for tomorrow

[Brissy-owl 256]

kick off only 28 hours away 

[Beighton Owl 87 1,466]

Wednesday 1-0 Norwich 

Paterson 

[theowlsman 40,785]

I’m washing my hair.

 

And it’s taking much longer nowadays.

[Lombardo 1,654]

2 minutes ago, theowlsman said:

I’m washing my hair.

 

And it’s taking much longer nowadays.

You want to join the slap head gang? No products touch my head...

[Tarquin 3,515]

Lets hope they give a good account of themselves, one thing I would like to see is that if Vrantic  plays we don`t show him across the edge of our area  and just jockey him away without him hitting the deck as he has done at least twice against us . It does my pill in to see good players like him doing a Brian Phelps . You would think the refs would know him by now but he`s still at it from what iv`e seen on TV.

[doubleo 1,786]

Pasting due and this could be it.

[Revenant 2,749]

"Teemu Pukki has now scored nine goals in just seven appearances, while Emiliano Buendia has chipped in with eight contributions in the final third over the same period."

 

 

 

FFS...

 

 

[Animis 5,891]

We did so well at theirs in December - in our usual way fell apart in the last 10 mins.

 

I think this game will be tight, but expect they'll sneak one at some point and that will be it.

 

Unfortunately, with the horrific last 7 games or so, we appear to be cannon fodder for most teams in this league. Can't see it changing.