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Mental Health and the Players


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2 hours ago, i used to be sc_owl said:

The amount of disgusting comments on Owlstalk pales in comparison to the poison on Twitter and Facebook. Those platforms are toxic. 
 

Whenever I comment on a player or manager I always try to approach it from a performance perspective rather than a personal perspective. For example; “player X had a poor game” rather than “player X is a c**t and I hope he dies”. 
 

On Facebook and Twitter you see plenty of the latter. 

facecloth and twatter, say no more.

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1 hour ago, DeeJayOne said:

Money/fame doesn't buy happiness or stop mental health problems.

Totally agree, but it helps you try and find it or get assistance with it in a lot more places.

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47 minutes ago, LondonOwl313 said:

Sorry to hear that mate... I was just saying that money is often a root cause of it, it certainly was for me. if I hadn't stopped I'd have ended up killing myself it was that bad. 

 

Think with most things in life happiness = reality - expectations. There's always some sort of trigger for anxiety as it's usually caused by things being outside of your control. Have you had counselling? That really helped for me

I have been to the end of the road myself a couple of times but luckily never taken the final turn. Yes have had counselling in the past I find the conventional NHS stuff doesn’t work, now in my 40s I have a few people that I can call and offload the rubbish in my head on it’s learning to get the help that works for you

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The link between wealth and mental health is not the same as the link between wealth and happiness. 
 

Studies have shown that the more wealth a person has, the happier they tend to be but only up to a point. That point is much lower than one might expect. Google it - it’s an interesting subject. Beyond that point though, happiness levels are roughly the same whether you have millions or billions. 
 

Happiness is not the opposite of depression, anxiety, stress, OCD, bipolar and so on. Mental illness is indiscriminate. The only thing wealth can do is open up better/faster treatment routes. 
 

I can forgive people who are ignorant of the research. I have a BSc in Psychology, a postgrad diploma in Occupational Psychology and a number of other qualifications in mental health awareness and related areas. I get that all people have different experience and knowledge levels about everything. 
 

What I can’t forgive is an unwillingness to learn, a lack of empathy and a general close-minded and bigoted approach to life and your fellow human. 

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11 minutes ago, i used to be sc_owl said:

The link between wealth and mental health is not the same as the link between wealth and happiness. 
 

Studies have shown that the more wealth a person has, the happier they tend to be but only up to a point. That point is much lower than one might expect. Google it - it’s an interesting subject. Beyond that point though, happiness levels are roughly the same whether you have millions or billions. 
 

Happiness is not the opposite of depression, anxiety, stress, OCD, bipolar and so on. Mental illness is indiscriminate. The only thing wealth can do is open up better/faster treatment routes. 
 

I can forgive people who are ignorant of the research. I have a BSc in Psychology, a postgrad diploma in Occupational Psychology and a number of other qualifications in mental health awareness and related areas. I get that all people have different experience and knowledge levels about everything. 
 

What I can’t forgive is an unwillingness to learn, a lack of empathy and a general close-minded and bigoted approach to life and your fellow human. 

 

Great last paragraph. Unfortunately there seems to be a lot of it about these days. 

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2 hours ago, LondonOwl313 said:

If I was a footballer I wouldn’t bother with social media.. you’re going on to the pitch to do a job and all you can do is focus on your game and what you’re doing. People talking on the outside either positively or negatively is irrelevant. Would also imagine that to get to be a pro in the first place you’ve been rejected many times or told you’re not good enough.. need to be mentally tough and have the self belief to be immune to criticism. You can’t censor critics it’s just not realistic.

 

Generally I think social media is toxic.. if you go on things like Twitter it’s like an echo chamber, full of people with bizarre views that you don’t seem to come across day to day. Probably because real people don’t waste their time on there and the freaks seek validation.

 

It’s always sad if someone feels they have to take their own life so feel for Caroline Flack’s family. But there is an element of wanting to have your cake and eat it... part of being a celebrity is the media attention, what goes with it is fame and preferential treatment, lots of money, meeting interesting people. It seems to me that she just wanted to cherry pick all of the good elements and not put up with the bad which is being open to criticism and media scrutiny. Lots of people are blaming the CPS and the media but the CPS have to charge if there’s potential evidence of a crime and at the end of the day if she didn’t do much wrong she’d have been cleared in court. She also couldn’t expect to not receive media coverage of it being in the public eye... it comes down to choices, remove yourself from the celebrity sphere and live a quiet life where the media leave you alone or be in the limelight for the perks but also the scrutiny. Feels a bit like she was depressed because she was losing all the good aspects temporarily and having to be scrutinised at the same time. Not sure what anyone realistically thinks should change.. would think that celebrities just need to be stronger mentally to deal with it.

It's a relatively modern phenomena.

It wasn't so long ago players could go about their business and take any critique on a match day.

These days it's 24/7 on social media and there's no escaping it.

It's a cancer of society and in my contributes detrimentally to the mental well being of many people, not just the famous.

 

1 hour ago, WalthamOwl said:

Don’t think there is anything wrong with saying players aren’t performing well and need to do better. However dishing out personal abuse is another matter. People hiding behind a keyboard dishing out hurtful abuse to someone they have never met before is pathetic. 

Could not agree more.

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It amazes me how many times this topic appears on Owlstalk and how many people then show a lack of understanding and awareness by constantly referring to how much they earn.  Money can't buy you love the fab 4 sang, it cannot buy you happiness or health, be that Physical or mental either.  It saddens me that so many chose to attack footballers for what they earn, they are not avatars in  game, they are real people like us (well some of us anyway).  Wish I could put my point across better.

"nobody told me there would be days like these!"

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2 hours ago, Jeffjohnsonmyhero said:

Mental health for players ,Let em  try having a mortgage 3 kids and getting made redundant   .

This is the sad thing about mental health and why it's such a difficult taboo to break when people such as yourselves just don't understand it. Being financially secure is totally irrelevant.

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1 hour ago, Striggy said:

It amazes me how many times this topic appears on Owlstalk and how many people then show a lack of understanding and awareness by constantly referring to how much they earn.  Money can't buy you love the fab 4 sang, it cannot buy you happiness or health, be that Physical or mental either.  It saddens me that so many chose to attack footballers for what they earn, they are not avatars in  game, they are real people like us (well some of us anyway).  Wish I could put my point across better.

 

Think players have to accept though the price for earning fortunes (which has gone up dramatically in last 10-15 years) is that the supporters will be more demanding.

 

 

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Once read that if you lose your leg your "Happiness" levels drop off and after awhile you return to  more or less your normal level of "Happiness".

 

If you win the lottery your "Happiness" levels go up and after awhile you return to more or less your normal level of "Happiness".

 

Dunno if that helps. Or if indeed it means anything.  

 

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I hope our footballers don't read this forum. Their emotions will be a roller coaster of ups and downs. I've been guilty of it and not proud of the abuse posted about some of our players on here. Currently the likes of Pelupessy is the fans favourite boo boy and not so long ago it was Fox. Then they go out and try to perform which can be met with fans shouting their names from the rafters when things go well to giving them dogs abuse when they don't. Footballers can earn a lot of money and enjoy the rewards and riches in life, but I can imagine it can also be a lonely existence for some of them. Think about a footballer being in a work place they are unhappy to be in, because of the abuse from fans, not fitting in with the dressing room or managers plans. In most cases its difficult for them to walk away due to their contractual obligations or maybe their financial commitments.

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5 minutes ago, Ronnie Starling said:

I hope our footballers don't read this forum. Their emotions will be a roller coaster of ups and downs. I've been guilty of it and not proud of the abuse posted about some of our players on here. Currently the likes of Pelupessy is the fans favourite boo boy and not so long ago it was Fox. Then they go out and try to perform which can be met with fans shouting their names from the rafters when things go well to giving them dogs abuse when they don't. Footballers can earn a lot of money and enjoy the rewards and riches in life, but I can imagine it can also be a lonely existence for some of them. Think about a footballer being in a work place they are unhappy to be in, because of the abuse from fans, not fitting in with the dressing room or managers plans. In most cases its difficult for them to walk away due to their contractual obligations or maybe their financial commitments.

 

Must admit I've said some negative things about certain players this season and going forward will temper my frustration.

 

 

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3 hours ago, AwokenGiant said:

Never quite understand why players and clubs don't communicate better with fans - like westwood has recently done - to put to bed any rumours, etc. Kind of nullifies all the needless (and often unhealthy) noise then.

 

If you'd read Twitter after Westwood's post you'd see that it hasn't put any rumours to bed in the slightest in fact it's fanned the flames of conspiracy theories on both sides.

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Just now, uɐıɹɐqɯıɹ⅁ said:

 

If you'd read Twitter after Westwood's post you'd see that it hasn't put any rumours to bed in the slightest in fact it's fanned the flames of conspiracy theories on both sides.

 

Yep why would you as a player have any contact with fans on social media? You can't please them at all. 

 

Shame that they can't have rational discourse with fans.

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