Popular Post Lord Snooty Posted August 21, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted August 21, 2018 (edited) "Evening Sir. I'm just laying out your clothes for tomorrow Sir. Will you be wanting your summer jacket?" "No thanks" "Gas mask?" "Gas mask?!" "Ready for the toxic atmosphere at Hillsborough Sir" "Where on Earth have you got that from? It won't be toxic" "No Sir? Old Ted in the Navvies arms was saying it will be really toxic down at Hillsborough tomorrow." "This Ted, is he a pig?" "No he's a Wednesday fan Sir" "When did he last go to a game? Where does he sit? Or is he one of these that says "I haven't been to the match Andy, I listened on the Radio but they were sheeite and I'm never going again while that clown is in charge. I haven't seen the game but I dont need to to know Palmer was rubbish"?" "Well he can't listen on the Radio Sir can he, I mean Wednesday are the only club in the league to say no to the new Radio de-" "Yes ,yes all right! Just seems to me that this Ted character he always has a lot to say for himself. What's he think about Morgan Fox? Actually, what does he think about Nuhiu eh. I'll bet I can guess." "Can't say he's ever mentioned them Sir. Or any of the players really. Other than to say they're cra- , erm, not very good Sir." "Hmmm." "So, the gas mask Sir?" "Certainly not. It won't be toxic. That's just a word that gets banded about these days. " "You're surely not expecting a good atmosphere though are you Sir. You haven't won a league game yet have you?" "I'm expecting it to be the same as it's been every week since they made it all seater Stubbs - Quiet! Until there's a goal. Or a bad tackle. That's just how it is except for the big games these days at football. Quiet in the home ends." "Except for the parping Sir" "We don't trump in the South stand Stubbs" "I meant the band Sir" "Oh that, right yes. Well, that's a whole other subject" "So you think it will be quiet then Sir?" "Yes. I think so. Since the seats went in it's never been the same" " Changed the acoustics has it?" " Maybe. But it's dispersed people. When it went all-seater folks dispersed through the ground. Anyway...there's something odd about singing sitting down don't you think? And shouting for that matter. " Like a morgue then" " At times. At times yes. But that's the modern game. It's not just us. I mean, people go to be entertained these days. It's a different mentality. Though with the prices it's understandable. Make people consumers and they'll behave like consumers. I do think the groans might come earlier with the first misplaced pass. That is bound to happen. Always does in this situation" " Sometimes a bad referee can help get the crowd going can't it Sir" "True, very true. And we've had no shortage of those down the years. Infact I can't remember a good one we've had down there" "I remember Sir, like that chap who reffed the Villa game who you had me go and threate-" "Stubbs!" "Erm...persuade to retire Sir" "Quite" "Ted says the fans want the Barnsley bloke in the hotseat. McCarthy" "Does he indeed" "Yes. Quite adamant. Says it needs a Yorkshireman." "This happens a lot though Stubbs. When people feel disheartened they want to feel a sense of belonging. Feel something that appeals to their own selves. So, yes a Yorkshireman is linked.It comforts them. Reminds them of when they were younger and the world was a simpler place. The idea nurses their nerves" "Ugh, how awful ....I've just had a vision of Mick McCarthy acting as Nanny to some full grown men Sir." "Breath Stubbs. breathe! "Sorry about that Sir. I just felt nauseous there for a moment." "Understandable." "Millwall tomorrow isn't it Sir?" "That's right." "Should be beating teams like that Sir" "Based on what?" "Sorry Sir?" "On what basis should we be 'beating teams like Millwall" "Well they're not a very big club are they" "And what does that matter? Bournemouth are in the bloody Premier League!" "Yes, but I mean they're not a great side are they." "They finished just outside the play off last year. Well above us. And they're above us again.They're unbeaten this season. Christ. The whole "Should be beating teams like that" thing really does my cork in. Millwall should actually be favourites on form." "Sorry Sir it's just that, well, old Ted said-" "Well tell Ted when you see him next that he's a simple minded bell cheddar. We're going in there tomorrow with them the higher placed and with us a squad with low morale and a load of kids. So we're not the favourites at all. And that all those sorts of comments and simple minded thinking that provides an extra, unwarranted expectation which inevitably leads to a subdued atmosphere and a huge feeling of disappointment when you don't get the result which really you shouldn't have been expecting in the first place. So tell him that when you see him! " "Probably won't see him Sir" "Oh?" "He's been barred Sir. Kept haranguing the Landlord, demanding to know when the next delivery of Batemans XXB was being delivered. Wanted to know the date, delivery time. Whether they brewery had their own dray waggons. Whether they sub contracted. How many barrels. How much they cost." "Had they run out of Batemans then?" "No Sir. That's the odd thing. They hadn't run out. And he doesn't drink it anyway" "Hmmm" "Oh Sir. What music would you like for the pre-match thread. You know. For the chaps to listen to while they read the match facts?" "Sadly , with all the doom around here of late. There can be only one choice" "Not...the Prokofiev Sir" " Sadly it's that time already" Wednesday - V - Millwall EFL Championship Hillsborough Stadium Kick off : 1945 OWLS 2/1 Draw 23/10 LIONS 11/8 Sheffield Wednesday will be looking for their first win of the season when they play Millwall on Wednesday. Forward Lucas Joao (groin) or (Monk-on) and defender Joost van Aken (ankle) will both be absent for Jos Luhukay's side. Millwall are expected to name the same team which earned them their first win of the season against Derby. Ryan Tunnicliffe and Shane Ferguson both came off the substitutes' bench against the Rams and will be pushing for a starting place. Match facts Sheffield Wednesday are unbeaten in four home Championship games against Millwall (W2 D2) since a 2-1 defeat in September 2005. Both Sheffield Wednesday and Millwall have found the net in each of the last eight league meetings between the sides There hasn't been shared a goalless draw in a league match between these sides since December 1947. Sheffield Wednesday have not won a league match on a Wednesday since January 2014 (2-0 v Blackpool), drawing four and losing three since then. Millwall have lost just two of their previous 23 games in the Championship (W13 D8), and are unbeaten in their opening three games of the current season (W1 D2).. Possible Millwall line up - : Possible Wednesday line up : Something from this lot... COME ON WEDNESDAY! Please, in the name of God, come on! It just won't even be worth having the internet if we get nothing today Edited March 9, 2021 by Lord Snooty 21 13 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sagesse Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 Come on Wednesday!!! Please.... Excellent MDT thingy, Snoots. Cracking read, as ever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rev Owl Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 (edited) Absolutely the best yet! 'He who has ears, let him hear' Come on you Blue and White Wizzzzarrds. Edited August 21, 2018 by Rev Owl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbo48 Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 Absolute classic Snoots. Ive chortled my way to bed 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RichieB Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 Your foookin bonkers Snooty 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pazowl55 Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 How many of our players over the years have been out through ( Monk-On ) that's what I would like to know. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogers Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 1-1 dour game, we score with our only shot around the 31st minute to go 1-0. Probably from a set piece. The second half Millwall push for an equaliser and score on the 65th minute. We hang on for a draw, after offering nothing but misplaced passes and passing it backwards / sidewards all match. Attendence 18,546. Hope I’m completely wrong Come on Wednesday! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Snooty Posted August 22, 2018 Author Share Posted August 22, 2018 9 minutes ago, A12owl said: Stayed up late to read today's offering your mightiness. Only one thing wrong with your suggested selection from that bunch is that we do not seem to have a goalie.Are you suggesting we go all out attack with 11 yes eleven outfield players. Have we suddenly acquired Super Team status that we don't need a goalkeeper. Master stroke Snoots. I keep suggesting you should be our manager LS on your track suit would look good. Will be watching on the Red Button on my sky box. Do you think I will be able to cope with the excitement? Our first win of the season. A scrappy 1-0. Nando to score again. I didn't want to mention you -know-who for fear the thread would descend into early morning GK selection debate chaos. We'll have enough on our plate as it is. I did actually volunteer for the managers job 3 and half years ago after the club turned down my (Genuine) original suggestion of Bielsa when Gray got the boot. Sadly neither myself nor the Argentine were represented by any Portuguese spivs. So.... I went back to the South stand and the Argentine. ..well, I don't really want to talk about where he's ended up... 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morepork Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 (edited) Great OMDT. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m just off down the boozer to bang Ted’s lights out...Bill’s gonna get it too, especially if he mentions BeefOven. Edited August 22, 2018 by Morepork 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ALAW Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 That Nando, who refused to play, MOM imo, Totally going to be our saviour, refused to play for Owls. We love him though and we put all our hopes on him. WE LOVE YOU, WE LOVE YOU. YOUR'E NOT A WASTER, WE ADORE YOU. WE WILL SELL OUR SOUL FOR YOU. WAWAWAW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Snooty Posted August 22, 2018 Author Share Posted August 22, 2018 4 minutes ago, Morepork said: Great OMDT. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m just off down the boozer to bang Ted’s lights out.... Don't forget he's barred from the Navvies. Try the Saracens Head or the Nuns Chuff. If you see him headed to the Black Horse leave him be. Mrs Wankskill the landlady is a formidable woman and will probably do him more damage than you or I could 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orlando_Trustful Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 Pretty much a must win and it isn't even September. A poor performance tonight and it will quickly become toxic. I am going for a great performance, but throwing it away late on. Us 2 v 2 Them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morepork Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 50 minutes ago, Lord Snooty said: Don't forget he's barred from the Navvies. Try the Saracens Head or the Nuns Chuff. If you see him headed to the Black Horse leave him be. Mrs Wankskill the landlady is a formidable woman and will probably do him more damage than you or I could I've just seen him enter the Nun's Chuff......I might give it ten minutes, could be messy! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westfield Owl Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 Must win game. Time for players to step up and take responsibility. And time for the manager to get the best out of our players by adopt a system that plays to their strengths Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theowlsman Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 I’ve bribed the ref. 3 points. That is all. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geedee Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 Masterful your lordship. 2-1 to the good guys this evening. Nerves steadied, season started, balance restored to the universe or summat like that. Dont forget folks its live on sky this evening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EccOvOwl Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 Something has to change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owls-swfc Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 PLAY UP WEDNESDAY ON WEDNESDAY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philb125 Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 Best one yet!! We not only have many teds on here but a fair few super teds too! Hopeful of a a win (always hopeful) but would settle for a clean sheet / better performance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quinnssweetshop Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 I want to be positive, but can only go on how things really are. A draw at best, at worst, sitting back defending plan by jos, failing as Millwall slice us open and knock two past an unorganised defence before halftime. Therein, complete meltdown at halftime.... Britney Spears soon follows with titty twisting and everythings set for the Owlstalk server crashing through the night and most of Thursday. Sales of hendos go through the roof as we all seek solice in a meat and potato pie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now