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Chris Kirkland and his battle with depression.


Guest mrbluesky

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2 hours ago, The Coorong Owl said:

I'm not doing so great lately to be honest as in the past few years. From what I can see it's becoming common these days. hats off to Chris Kirkland quality

 

Sad to hear that.  If I can ever be of support mate just get in touch. 

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18 hours ago, darklord said:

Good on him for talking about it. I suffer from depression and anxiety. I tried to drown myself in the sea at 15, I've overdosed and had surgery to repair slashed wrists over the years so I know the battle all to well. 

I'm 40 now and on tablets permanently  and its taken years to come to terms with.  Each day is hard and some are bloody awful but I don't mind talking about it. Its a bloody lonely place at times and I cannot tell you how it feels to think your next breathe is your last.  Dark places, and if talking about it can save just one person then it's worth the odd person thinking your a nutter. 

 

 

Don't ever let anyone tell you your a nutter mate. Hope your worst days are behind you now. 

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4 minutes ago, Leaping Lannys Perm said:

Fair play to him for having the guts to cone forward with it. Hopefully he is on the mend.

 

I felt an uncomfortable sense of familiarity with the talk of wondering if you would commit suicide. Logic tells you it is wrong but when you are really down, you start to lose your logic.

That's the thing, and people say "well think of this, or that" if you tell them how you feel, but honestly, you feel like everyone is better off without you because all you can see is how much pain and trouble you cause them

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I like to think that as a society we are becoming more and more aware/understanding of mental health problems. 

 

Thankfully, those who tell someone to "cheer up" or can't fathom how multimillionaires can be depressed, are increasingly becoming the minority. 

 

You've got to think that battles with anxiety, depression etc are commonplace up and down the various football locker rooms in this country. 

 

After all, I think it's reasonably well established that mental health problems are most prevalent in young men (between 20 - 40) and it is that demographic who are most likely to take their lives as a result. 

 

Huge credit to Chris Kirkland for coming out and being so honest. Good servant for our club and as he pointed out in the article probably never got the credit for how good of a player he actually was. 

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I  am suffering from depression too. My best man was bi-polar and committed suicide in August.

 

It is good that people can talk about depression. I think it is easier now than it has been in the past and we are finding that more people than you expected are fellow sufferers. It is good to know you are not alone but it is still not that easy to talk about it because you think no-one wants to know. You can't just announce it.

 

Someone high profile talking publicly does help raise awareness and understanding of mental health issues.

 

Good on you Chris!

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I have lived with depression since 1987, suffering 2 break downs, it is the loneliest illness in the world, the words in the song by Roxy Music "Loneliness is a crowded room" really sums it all up.

I am now in control of the illness, through medication and recognising the signs, so when they flair up I can react.

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13 minutes ago, adelphi1867 said:

I have lived with depression since 1987, suffering 2 break downs, it is the loneliest illness in the world, the words in the song by Roxy Music "Loneliness is a crowded room" really sums it all up.

I am now in control of the illness, through medication and recognising the signs, so when they flair up I can react.

 

Brave of you to speak of Depression.

 

I have friends who suffer, as you do.

Sadly, last year a former work mate, took his own life.

We knew nothing of his illness. 

If we had known, we may have been able to help.

We will never know.........

 

It is often more difficult for men to open up to friends or family due in part to issues of "masculinity " and the "friendly banter"  and "MACHO" culture that is often found in male relationships.

 

Many men are afraid to show any side of their personality that others may see as a sign of weakness.

 

I believe that slowly, things are improving .

Things are now much more positive with regard to Mental health, than was the case when I was a boy.

 

Things are moving in the right direction.

 

Wishing you all the best !

Good Luck !

WAWAW......... UTO..... And all that !

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I doubt there is a poster on here who hasn't been affected by depression or other mental illnesses either directly or indirectly. It's great that it's finally getting recognition, and people like Chris and posters on here being brave enough to open up about it, is life affirming and can only help to further the recognition, allow others to open up and seek help before we lose more lives.

 

Good on ya chaps.

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Guest mrbluesky
3 minutes ago, darklord said:

It's no wonder theres so much moaning on owlstalk.  We are all miserable buggers lol

To be honest I think we’re all flippingbipolar!!

 

Mmm...WABAW! :biggrin:

 

On a serious note it’s a horrid illness, took the life of my cousin 20 years ago when there wasn’t as much help out there and yes never judge a book by its cover, he was the life and soul of the party, married with a son,successful businessman and then gone.

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16 hours ago, darklord said:

Good on him for talking about it. I suffer from depression and anxiety. I tried to drown myself in the sea at 15, I've overdosed and had surgery to repair slashed wrists over the years so I know the battle all to well. 

I'm 40 now and on tablets permanently  and its taken years to come to terms with.  Each day is hard and some are bloody awful but I don't mind talking about it. Its a bloody lonely place at times and I cannot tell you how it feels to think your next breathe is your last.  Dark places, and if talking about it can save just one person then it's worth the odd person thinking your a nutter. 

 

I've been on Citalopram for years, what are you on? Thankfully now I try and see the sign early of an attack. If you haven't been a sufferer yourself it's truly hard to understand. When your mind is not your own it can do scary things and you think you're doing what's right but you clearly aren't. Only looking back at episodes now when you're in more 'decent' health can you take stock. I agree with you, people should talk more and not be scared.

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8 minutes ago, MuddyFunkster said:

 

I've been on Citalopram for years, what are you on? Thankfully now I try and see the sign early of an attack. If you haven't been a sufferer yourself it's truly hard to understand. When your mind is not your own it can do scary things and you think you're doing what's right but you clearly aren't. Only looking back at episodes now when you're in more 'decent' health can you take stock. I agree with you, people should talk more and not be scared.

 

My trigger appeared to be the loss of a good friend when we were playing football 15 years ago which with me bottling it up and an accumulation of other small factors sent me into a downward spiral over time. The most trivial things are magnified to such a degree that you just want to end it all. I remember being in my hallway putting on a pair of shoes and the lace snapping. I'm not aheavilybemotional guy but I just slumped to my knees and cried constantly for 5 hours and didn't leave the house for days.

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1 hour ago, MuddyFunkster said:

 

I've been on Citalopram for years, what are you on? Thankfully now I try and see the sign early of an attack. If you haven't been a sufferer yourself it's truly hard to understand. When your mind is not your own it can do scary things and you think you're doing what's right but you clearly aren't. Only looking back at episodes now when you're in more 'decent' health can you take stock. I agree with you, people should talk more and not be scared.

Im on trazadone these days, more if a sleep help. Used to be on Fluoxetine but had side effects.

Getting the help in the first place can be a struggle.

When I jumped in the Harbour at 15  and went to the hospital I got no psch evaluation or the like. In fact even after several more attempts over the next 4 years (including slashing my wrists with a bottle in the middle of a nightclub on a  staff night out (that made me popular at work!) and having to be operated on because of it I still got no help or pysch evaluation. (in fact my GP told my girlfriend at the time it was done for attention).

It wasnt until around 2 years later my next girlfriend (my wife these days) marched me into the doctors after I basically had a breakdown. Luckily the Dr I saw was lovely and she got the ball rolling.  Took a long time to get some sort of balance, (I once attempted to drill into my head with a cordless drill and the neighbours had to stop me.

That was almost 15 years ago now and while I do get down just about everyday I have learnt to cope and I dont get the big ruts like before. Only once in the last 10 years have I thought about suicide again (last Christmas in fact).

 

So to all those suffering yes its bobbar and a bloody dark place but you can get yourself through to a more manageble state. The hardest thing is asking for help when your at your lowest. I once posted on here late at night about 3 years ago when I was in a state and the support of a few Owlstalk strangers that night helped me get to the next day.

 

So no matter how friggin embarassed you may be ask for help even if its from a bloody stranger. Because I promise you no matter how hard that might seem its a dam sight easier than writing a note to your loved ones or standing on that harbour wall and jumping in.

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27 minutes ago, darklord said:

Im on trazadone these days, more if a sleep help. Used to be on Fluoxetine but had side effects.

Getting the help in the first place can be a struggle.

When I jumped in the Harbour at 15  and went to the hospital I got no psch evaluation or the like. In fact even after several more attempts over the next 4 years (including slashing my wrists with a bottle in the middle of a nightclub on a  staff night out (that made me popular at work!) and having to be operated on because of it I still got no help or pysch evaluation. (in fact my GP told my girlfriend at the time it was done for attention).

It wasnt until around 2 years later my next girlfriend (my wife these days) marched me into the doctors after I basically had a breakdown. Luckily the Dr I saw was lovely and she got the ball rolling.  Took a long time to get some sort of balance, (I once attempted to drill into my head with a cordless drill and the neighbours had to stop me.

That was almost 15 years ago now and while I do get down just about everyday I have learnt to cope and I dont get the big ruts like before. Only once in the last 10 years have I thought about suicide again (last Christmas in fact).

 

So to all those suffering yes its bobbar and a bloody dark place but you can get yourself through to a more manageble state. The hardest thing is asking for help when your at your lowest. I once posted on here late at night about 3 years ago when I was in a state and the support of a few Owlstalk strangers that night helped me get to the next day.

 

So no matter how friggin embarassed you may be ask for help even if its from a bloody stranger. Because I promise you no matter how hard that might seem its a dam sight easier than writing a note to your loved ones or standing on that harbour wall and jumping in.

 

Its disappointing to read accounts such as yours where health professionals have undoubtably misread the situation. About 10 years ago the wife of a close friend was having all sorts of mental issues, so much that my friend asked for her to be admitted into care as he feared she would take her own life. She’d had similar episodes previously and her brother had taken his life years earlier. Sadly hospital care was declined and she tragically committed suicide. Hopefully it’s far less likely that this could happen today, but like all things medical, we rely on people making the right decisions.

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