I would like to see a collection of blue and white, Father Christmas themed garden gnomes, with the faces of our 150 best players on. Because of the ruined anniversary.
You would be able to get Fessi, Johnny Fantham, Derek Wilkinson, Nile Rodgers out of Chic, That striker who doesn't like us anymore because his lad didn't get a pro contract, Eric Potts and err, some other ones. But there could be 150 of them, dead easy. Might have to put Peter Eustace in to make up the numbers, but he could go for a fiver, or free when you buy a Brian Joicey gnome.
If you want to annoy your neighbours, you can get a Lemmy out of Motörhead (Youth Academy goalie U15) gnome what looks really scary. It costs £357.99 though, so you need to be in a dispute where the folks next door keep moving their garden fence inch by inch, under cover of darkness, onto your lawn. The Lemmy model comes with an auto dialler that randomly calls 999 to report chip pan fires on random addresses in your street at all hours.