PopePiusX

Church, all day.

Also, he's 53. When I get to 53, if I'm writing deliberately provocative things on the internet and then calling every response a success, then you have my permission to come round, shoot me, and bury me with the below hairstyle, coincidentally worn by the former journeyman footballer Kevin Gage, who remains a complete scrotum of a man.

I for one am very uncomfortable living in a world where Kevin Gage has turned out to be an absolute bellsniff.

Both Joan Collins and Collins Joan were professional footballers

I'm looking forward to it, at least chronologically.

I was going to say Andy Townsend, who continues to wreak his revenge with his commentary; as somebody other than me said, when he gets home, he doesn't have sex with his wife. he gets in and about her, Clive. Vinnie Jones got an absolute boatload when he went in goal in that same game as well.

Wim Jonk was hardly going to injure himself standing still, was he?

Or the Wicker Man remake

F*ck 'em, they're only bees.

'There's no such thing as bad weather' is possibly the most wrong thing I've ever read in my life.

My advice would be not to dress as rats for the occasion, so you'll only look like drowned humans.

If you were a pie, what pie would you be and why? That question to contestant number two.

I saw Kit Fiasco in 1996, supporting Trellis at the Rochester Prendergast. Terrible gig.

I have been to Tynecastle but I didn't notice anything due to being absolutely off my mash. Hope this helps.

Yes! The flat cap absolutely covered in badges is a much-undervalued matchday outfit.